tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-59315492012-01-03T18:13:44.440-08:00Spilt Wineme- mike wallaceMichaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comBlogger4691100tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-66020662100776838392012-01-03T18:05:00.001-08:002012-01-03T18:05:22.412-08:00Yesterday I had to take my two children to the dentist; Gracie, seven years old and Jacob, four years old. The morning started out with some excitement, Gracie and Jacob both brushing their teeth will extra vigilance in hopes to impress the dentist, but as time drew close to the appointment, the excitement began to fade and turn into anxiety and then fear. The car ride the dentist became quite Michaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-19150506037094517562011-10-17T08:25:00.001-07:002011-10-17T08:25:52.695-07:00sermon I preached two weeks agoGod Loves you Rock Church 10-2-11John 15:12-14 “This is My commandment, that you love one another, just as I have loved you. Greater Love has no one than this, that one lay down his life for his friends. You are my Friends if you do what I command.” Tonight I would like to unpack the truth that God loves us. Unfortunately, the statement on its own, has become somewhat cliché andMichaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-91144790313870396492011-05-31T12:22:00.002-07:002011-05-31T12:42:17.465-07:00Exerts taken from Desiring God by John Piper. "Suffering, whether it be sickness, or persecution have this in common: they are both intended by Satan for the destruction of our faith and governed by God for the purifying of our faith. God rules over Satan and gives him no more leash than can accomplish His ultimate purpose. God's purposes are opposite of Satan's. Christ's sovereignly accomplishesMichaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-12681005489668868422011-05-31T12:22:00.001-07:002011-05-31T12:22:49.814-07:00King David was a man after God's own heart (1st Sam. 13:13-14 & Acts 13:22) and nothing more clearly shows this then David's writings in Psalms. Psalm 27:4, David asks one thing. He writes: "One thing I have asked from the Lord, that I shall seek; That I may dwell in the house of the Lord all the days of my life, To behold the beauty of the Lord, And to meditate in His temple." What is David Michaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-37318516553505133112011-02-16T16:46:00.000-08:002011-02-16T16:47:14.985-08:00I have nothing comingI have come to the conclusion, that we all have more than we deserve. There should be no expectations or feelings of entitlement, because, none of us have anything coming...If anything, those of us that follow Christ, the only thing we have coming is a cross to bare. With that in mind, we should always have a sense of gratitude. We should be grateful for what we do have. We may not have Michaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-79205840641878436992011-01-10T16:01:00.001-08:002011-01-10T16:23:49.869-08:00My friend C.W. It really is a travesty to not realize how important or how much a person means to you until they fall ill, sick, or become inured, worse yet, are gone. This morning when I began to pray for my friend C.W., I began to cry because I realized how important he has been to me and how much he has taught me. C.W. is ill and has been recently hospitalized. He has been battling cancer forMichaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-72326513027557436262010-12-12T10:19:00.000-08:002010-12-12T23:01:58.174-08:00Tonight at church, I am speaking a little bit about Christmas and the story of the Prodigal Son. I am sure you are wondering, what does the Prodigal Son have to do with Christmas, and I would say everything! Let me start by saying the story of the Prodigal son is a special one because its one of those 3 for 1 deals. With one story, you get three applications. We see that there are three Michaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-63788236221841111712010-12-10T11:48:00.000-08:002010-12-10T11:50:06.828-08:00A couple of weeks ago, I had the privilege to preach a sermon at our church. I thought I would share with those who were not there my sermon in written text. Scripture reading:Romans Chapter 8: 1-13 (print in bulletin) Well, you guys are stuck with me tonight…I am a little nervous, so forgive me if I miss speak or stutter, or use the umm 100 times. There are a few things about preaching that I Michaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-20325592484002485922010-09-21T08:54:00.001-07:002010-09-21T08:54:54.153-07:00Corky family memoriesI sometimes wonder what kind of family memories my children will have when they are older. I wonder if Gracie will remember this morning; standing in the front yard, dressed and ready to go to school, as her brother stood next to her, starch naked and her mom dressed in her pajamas, helping me push-start the family car down the street.Michaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-86637961818552120342010-08-16T18:26:00.000-07:002010-08-16T18:43:10.867-07:00What better way to embarrass your older sister, than to show up to her school dressed as Spider-manLast Friday, I had to go pick Gracie up from school because Audrey was in Los Angeles with her mother. At about the time Jacob and I needed to head out the door to go get her, Jacob insisted on being allowed to wear his Spider-man costume. No problem there, actually, I thought it would be pretty funny to see Gracie's face when she saw her little brother dressed up as Spider-man. Once we got to Michaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-81133570742528994132010-08-14T11:15:00.001-07:002010-08-14T11:17:51.391-07:00I dont need God to discipline me. I do that plenty to myself through my own foolish and self destructions actions. If He did, I am pretty sure that I might be able to make an argument at the gates of heaven of "Double Jeopardy".Michaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-44614217320048690752010-07-26T18:56:00.000-07:002010-07-28T08:28:09.565-07:00Year 2 birthday share.In regard to my past drinking dilemma and obsession, it really was no different than most of you. I grew up in an alcoholic home, I started drinking in high school and it progressed through college. I drank alcoholically from the get go and over time, the binge drinking morphed into everyday drinking without me even really noticing or caring. It was a lot of fun at first but over time it became aMichaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-12413450869986623022010-07-23T21:03:00.001-07:002010-07-23T21:03:49.008-07:00AA Quote of the week:"Have you ever noticed that you are at your best when you are helping other people?"Michaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-79616229994442894842010-04-11T18:25:00.000-07:002010-05-17T13:28:20.429-07:003 dollar golf shoesI am not much of a golfer. After I graduated high school, my dad got me a job at the golf course where he was a frequent player. He also had given me his old golf clubs, which I learned how to play the game with and still have today. Back then, I played a lot because I had a lot more free time on my plate and not to mention it was free. As I have gotten older I have played less and less because Michaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-42135267540765163922010-02-10T08:07:00.001-08:002010-02-10T12:19:40.130-08:00I had a dream about Jesus last night. It was the first time ever in my life that I had dreamed about Him. I was standing in a market place, something like would you read about in the bible, but this market place with no pavement, just dust and dirt, was in modern times. There was a large crowd of people going about their business. In the middle of all of the commotion of people moving about, Michaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-11810031281518323832010-01-13T12:40:00.000-08:002010-01-13T18:48:33.867-08:00When I was doing Youth Ministry, the most challenging and frustrating aspect was working with disinterested Christians. These kids had grown up in the church, their parents were usually involved in ministries or at the very least attended regularly. They had chosen to follow Christ and most had been baptized. At one point of their faith, they held a desire to learn about God and grow in His love,Michaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-48321427545958322942010-01-11T17:52:00.001-08:002010-01-11T17:57:53.426-08:00I went fishing this last Saturday. Something I haven’t done in a while and hardly enough. A little bit of “self-time” in the mountains is R&R to my soul, which has felt dried up for a while. As I headed up towards the mystic Sierra Nevada mountains, my heart was full excitement and was longing to connect with God, something else I haven’t seem to done in a while. My soul and heart were giddy and Michaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-84521075707864178772009-12-09T18:38:00.000-08:002009-12-09T18:57:17.991-08:00I have been searching for the big idea for the last month. You know what I am talking about, the "BIG IDEA"! The answer, the direction you are going to lead your life towards, the money maker, so on so forth. I have been trying to come up with ways to make more money; business ideas;job directions; and have even reevaluated my passions. I have come up with a couple of thoughts, but no "BIG IDEA".Michaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-30681311337949355502009-11-18T09:03:00.000-08:002009-11-18T09:06:48.230-08:00I recently came to the conclusion that perhaps Grace and Judgment were two sides of the same coin. Without truth, judgment and consequences, there would be no Grace, because there would be nothing to forgive, and we know forgiveness is an extension and act of Grace. I guess it is a matter of spiritual maturity on behalf of the believer to take inventory, listen and abide by the Holy Spirit and Michaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-72673990325284110682009-11-17T13:26:00.001-08:002009-11-17T17:16:39.620-08:00Last week, I took one of the kids incarcerated at the juvenile boot camp to the Army Recruiting Center to take the Army Enlistment Test. When we arrived, the recruiter I had been working with was not available. The make the situation worse, the person giving the test did not want to give my guy the test because he was incarcerated. I felt bad for the kid because all of the sudden he became to Michaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-53673739385121941982009-10-04T16:34:00.001-07:002009-10-04T16:37:06.386-07:00"The pain made the city more beautiful. The story made us different characters than if we'd showed up at the ending an easier way. It made me think about the hard lives so many people have had, the sacrifices they've endured, and how those people will see heaven differently from those of us who have had easier lives."- A million Miles in a Thousand Years.Michaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-85754448656156216922009-10-04T14:22:00.000-07:002009-11-17T17:18:01.922-08:00A Soccer PrayerDuring Gracie's soccer game yesterday, our team found ourselves in a familiar situation. It was the fourth quarter and we were losing 7 to nothing. I huddled the girls together for a little team meeting. As I was discussing strategy with the little five year olds, the shiest and most petite girl on the team spoke up and said "Coach, why don't we pray for God to lets have a goal?" IMichaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-57944000979266324802009-08-31T13:04:00.001-07:002009-08-31T13:10:19.960-07:00The book that speaks truth.I can’t tell you how many times I have opened my Bible in hopes to find an answer to a question or problem only to find nothing of the sort. Then again, I can’t tell you how many times I have found what I believe to be answers to questions I have had and have found comfort in the wisdom the book holds. Of course, there have been other times when I have read my Bible Michaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-65909716081311239652009-08-05T17:29:00.000-07:002009-08-06T08:25:24.364-07:00A.A. Quote of the Week:"When my friends failed me, there was nothing left but God.When my marriage failed, there was nothing left but God. When my family left, there was nothing left but God.When my money was all gone, there was nothing left but God. When I was lonely, there was nothing there but God. When my heart was broken, there was nothing left but God.When I was out of answers, there was Michaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-43068245945270463472009-07-27T09:08:00.001-07:002009-07-27T13:08:16.641-07:00Living AmendsUnfortunately, we don’t always have an opportunity to make our amends to others and in those cases the best thing we can do is make a living amends. A couple of years ago, during Jason’s last days, I did something that I have felt terrible about. I am the kind of alcoholic that once I start drinking, I don’t stop until I am good and drunk and ready to pass out. During the week beforeMichaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-51704164057851853022009-07-03T09:43:00.001-07:002009-07-03T09:45:05.080-07:00Letter to my A.A. Friends. Well Friends, it’s been 361 days since my last drink. I have so many emotions stirring in me as approach my first AA birthday. First of all, I am excited and extremely proud. I am also at the same time, humbled and blessed knowing that first of all, the obsession to drink was removed by God (may I forever remain thankful) and that through this program, which I feel is Michaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-40472299559624071222009-05-06T13:03:00.000-07:002009-05-06T13:35:14.250-07:00It’s funny to me how people react when I tell them that I am an alcoholic and that I attend A.A.. I told my father Monday night and his reaction was pretty much par for the course with everyone else I tell. He gave me a weird look and didn't know exactly what to say except that he didn’t know I had a problem. I could sense the awkwardness. It’s always awkwardness when I tell people. Sometimes, I Michaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-61397555946550618222009-04-26T14:27:00.000-07:002009-04-26T14:29:05.888-07:00A.A. quote of the week:" We don't care how the jackass got into the ditch, we just care about getting the jackass out".Michaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-82159196108431230852009-04-18T20:52:00.001-07:002009-04-19T10:02:08.850-07:00A.A. Quote of the week:" We are spiritual beings having a human experience".Michaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-13775860258118875052009-04-09T10:00:00.000-07:002009-04-09T16:23:01.094-07:00Imagine this: You are 22 years old. You have spent your whole life pursing a dream to become a major league baseball player. You practice hard, play hard, workout hard and make hard scarifies to make your dream come true and it happens. You get your shot in the big leagues. You pitch your fourth major league game of your career. You go six scoreless innings in front of 40 thousand fans. You are Michaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-76413771743098798872009-04-02T21:25:00.000-07:002009-04-02T21:28:46.605-07:00I'm doing it.Michaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-20280330414292717562009-03-31T21:27:00.000-07:002009-03-31T21:32:20.177-07:0037 years.Time moves us whether we remain still and wait or constantly run from it.I'm sitting right now on the main road in Sausalito, looking out to the bay. On my right lies San Francisco, the city where Jason thrived in life, friendships were born, bonds formed, brotherhoods found and memories will always playfully scamper in my thoughts making me smile. To my left lies Angel Island. Where we Michaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-58626566567886832612009-03-16T09:14:00.001-07:002009-04-05T22:20:34.422-07:00After a weekend of yard work I find myself very sore. I am not sure if it is because I am getting older or if it is a lack of physical exercise and stretching, probably both. But if you ask Gracie it’s because I am old. Just yesterday as Gracie and I were driving home from Lowes, we passed the house I lived in during my high school years. So I tell Gracie, “Look, see that house? That is the houseMichaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-26541143578271372882009-03-14T23:18:00.001-07:002009-03-14T23:19:14.085-07:00A.A. quote of the week:"In case you haven't already figured it out, the game is fixed. God wins".Michaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-47469531570743807432009-03-07T11:48:00.000-08:002009-03-07T11:50:50.581-08:00Gracie asked me a very good question last night. She asked "Daddy, how come people just don't ask Jesus questions and look in the bible to see what He says instead of asking the President?"Maybe because some people think our president is Jesus?Michaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-60617470360322042772009-03-07T11:43:00.001-08:002009-03-07T11:43:13.115-08:00As I was driving the other day I got a glimpse of something really beautiful that made my heart warm. I saw a young lady sitting on a bus stop bench with what appeared to be her little child, who was no older than 2 months old or so. This lady was not attractive by social standards. She had brown flat hair, thick glasses and old, worn mis-matched sweats on. She didn’t have any make-up on and was Michaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-22227438881516925412009-03-06T16:53:00.000-08:002009-04-05T22:19:29.776-07:00While sitting in the beach this weekend, watching my kids play in the sand and waves, I saw a beautiful analogy between man and God. My children appeared so small and helpless in comparison to the large, vast, deep and powerful Pacific Ocean, yet, they played in the shallow, cold, crisp and refreshing waters with content hearts, all a long, keeping a healthy fear of the Ocean. I am so so small Michaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-55039116691048531352009-03-05T06:24:00.000-08:002009-03-05T06:26:21.529-08:00A.A. quote of the week:" I have been given the keys to the Kingdom for the exchange of a bottle and a hang-over".Michaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-45378881215258197862009-02-21T13:00:00.001-08:002009-02-21T21:51:35.018-08:00So, I read the Shack last weekend. If you haven’t read it, you might want to skip this blog post. Here is my book report:What I liked about the Shack. I think my favorite chapter was the Cave of Judgment. For me, it really drove home the “Don’t Judge lest you be judged yourself” instruction by Jesus. (The whole you cant take a speck out or your brother’s eye when you have a log in yours) I also Michaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-53738153408693086762009-02-12T06:37:00.000-08:002009-02-12T06:47:09.675-08:00I like how my sponsor closes when ever he speaks at A.A. meeting or an event. He says: " God reveals himself to me through all of you. You are beautiful stain glass windows that God shines his light through"Michaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-46744046466378216812009-01-31T20:51:00.001-08:002009-01-31T21:13:55.376-08:00Tonight in an A.A. meeting a question was asked. " How do you rationalize not working your program or drinking again and what do you do to get your head out of that thinking?"I didn't get called on to speak tonight so I will share my thoughts here. As I was listening to people speak I realized that for me, when I think about drinking or slacking off in working my program I am actually Michaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-34313137853259689062009-01-30T09:59:00.000-08:002009-01-30T10:03:06.580-08:00My letter to Senator Fienstien taht I sent this morning. Senator Feinstein, I am extremely disappointed beyond use of words over your support and over zealous endorsement of the 800 billion dollar so called stimulus bill. You said so yourself, that though over 80 thousand Californians have contacted your office asking you to not support the bill; however, you plan to anyhow because your Michaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-62362145873520036892009-01-19T21:36:00.001-08:002009-01-20T06:33:34.638-08:00The fight. Inside a large Colosseum was a little man fighting gladiators twice as big, twice as strong and twice as skilled as he was. In his hand he wield with all his might, in every direction, a sword, fighting off the gladiators. Sitting way up in the bleacher seats was an old wise man who yelled down to the over-matched little man "put down your sword!" The little man looked up at the old Michaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-15190911374231513282009-01-10T21:33:00.000-08:002009-01-10T22:02:23.695-08:00When Gracie was a newborn, I use to take her on walks along the ditch by our house. There are giant oak trees along the path and for years I have been wanting to hang a swing from one of the trees. I even blogged about it back on July 8, 2004, if you care to look it up. Anyhow, while on a walk today with Gracie and her two little buddies, Gavin and Quinten, I came across that old tree. It had Michaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-10525037154824768132009-01-02T14:06:00.000-08:002009-01-02T14:36:17.736-08:00As I was leaving for work this morning, I heard a crow crowing from the street lamppost. The crow caught my attention because it had been a long time since I have heard a crow. I stopped in the middle of my lawn and looked up at the bird and listen to it crow three more times before it flew away. The first thing that came to my mind was the story of Peter denying Christ three times before the Michaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-2526375696362690842008-12-29T21:41:00.000-08:002008-12-29T21:42:43.818-08:00A.A Quote of the week:"Success is never certain and failure is never final."Michaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-50257703141691350102008-12-18T16:20:00.001-08:002008-12-18T16:29:44.126-08:00I came a across an interesting quote in a book I am reading, (Amusing Ourselves to Death). In part, it read: "...no force other than reason itself could be employed to bring light to the unbeliever". It makes a lot of sense to me. I wonder though, in today's church culture, how often, if ever, do we allow people to exercise their reasoning power and skills?Michaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-56106023109967891832008-12-10T17:46:00.001-08:002008-12-10T17:54:50.185-08:00Remember that stupid thing our parents use to say to us right before they gave us a spanking? "This will hurt me more than it will hurt you". As a kid, I thought that was the stupidest thing ever, but tonight, I realized its true. Because of some behavior issues, one of the which included lying to her mother, Gracie got her first official spanking from me. I didn't recite the parental line of oldMichaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-78676265691000935022008-12-09T12:33:00.000-08:002008-12-09T12:44:12.966-08:00A.A. Quote of the week:"Only with love can you combat fear. You cant use hate, anger, or control because they are all allied with fear".Michaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-30353708469982759352008-12-08T14:34:00.000-08:002008-12-08T16:05:20.309-08:00Charlie Brown Christmas is by far my favorite Christmas movie ever! For as long as I can remember, I have watched the Christmas special on TV every year. I like the Christmas special so much because of the message it has. Poor Charlie is so blue and down cast because he is can’t find any joy, peace or happiness within the commercialism of Christmas and it is not until Linus reminds him of the Michaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-78848284179213117792008-12-04T08:13:00.001-08:002008-12-04T08:17:24.251-08:00I was talking to my friends Will and Russ via e-mail about cancer and how so many people we know are being diagnosed with the wretched illness. This is what Russ had to say about it. "Sometimes I wonder if cancer isn't a metaphor for what's wrong with us. Healthy, normal cells forget where they are and what they are there to do and so they starting growing in the wrong ways, wreaking havoc. WhatMichaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-20792852101581962582008-12-03T10:34:00.000-08:002008-12-03T10:42:48.711-08:00One of the magical and mysterious things about music is how a song can capture and keep a moment, feeling and time. I love listening to music that brings back feelings and memories, good and bad. The good memories because they warm my heart of people and places that I miss and the bad because I am reminded that I survived, grew and over came. This morning as I was driving to work on this gray, Michaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-16713418863009758482008-12-01T12:39:00.000-08:002008-12-01T15:51:35.812-08:00A.A. Quote of the week:"There are two types of problems, Cadillac Problems and Real Problems. If you don’t know the difference, a Cadillac Problem is wanting a Lexis, but can only afford a Toyota. A Real Problem is having to decide whether to put food on the table or gas in the car in order to drive to work".Michaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-41879215707091651242008-11-30T15:54:00.000-08:002008-12-02T20:35:40.608-08:00Last week I had a little scare. I found a suspicious lump, which was concern enough for me to make a doctors appointment to have it checked out. For whatever reason Tuesday night of last week, I got really scared. Partly because I really thought about what it could mean, and my best friend died of cancer a year and half of ago. Also, I know someone who is close to my age, who is undergoing cancerMichaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-25933859270966615992008-11-21T11:34:00.001-08:002008-11-21T15:52:51.617-08:00Its funny how you can go about life learning things, specifically complex things and then one day learn something so simple that you have to ask yourself, "how did I not know this before"? Something so simple… so common sense. I just learned information is not transformation. I came across this conclusion while in my AA meetings. You can gather a head full of information, but until you apply the Michaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-28101954321504704012008-11-14T14:53:00.000-08:002008-11-14T14:58:05.752-08:00If you want a say a prayer that really changes your prospective on your own attitude and behavior towards other people try praying " God, let people treat me today the way I treated people yesterday". I have been making this a daily prayer. Right off the bat, I have been catching myself acting and behaving not so cool towards others and having to make amends. Apologies are hard...Michaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-2387092861288518782008-11-12T21:28:00.001-08:002008-11-13T11:40:43.473-08:00The down side of A.A.Tonight, I think I had my first real disappointment since I stopped drinking. I have been filling my evenings with ice cream, cakes, deserts, and other sweets, which has taken the place of drinking beer or wine. It has worked really well and often times I look forward to the evenings after dinner for that "something special". Tonight, I had a craving for a nice warm vanilla Michaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-78930249365290889082008-11-09T17:23:00.000-08:002008-11-09T17:24:46.029-08:00A.A. quote of the week: "Poor me, poor me, pour me another drink".Michaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-40720554119450799902008-11-07T12:19:00.000-08:002008-11-07T18:14:31.755-08:00Not so free gift. Earlier this week, my dad gave Gracie a turtle, which he explained to me on the phone as having its own little box and food. So, I agreed that he could give Gracie the turtle. I figured it was a cheap pet, costing me nothing and that the turtle may get Gracie off the kick she has been on wanting a puppy. Needless to say Gracie was ecstatic to receive such a gift from her grandpaMichaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-23489000012780601652008-11-04T20:36:00.000-08:002008-11-05T06:21:17.318-08:00I was driving home this evening and as I was listening to the radio, it was announced that Barack Obama was the projected winner of the Presidential Election. All of sudden a wave of emotions and feelings fell over me. At first, I felt sad and disappointed that John McCain didn't win. I truly believed that if anyone deserved to be President, based on merit, sacrifice, and accomplishments, it was Michaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-76000952568180214032008-11-04T07:56:00.000-08:002008-11-04T08:03:59.191-08:00They said this election year will produce a record number of voters. After standing in line to vote this morning, I believe it. It's an exciting time, one that I believe Gracie and Jacob will read and learn about in their history classes to come. No matter who wins the vote tonight, American History will be written. We will either have the first African American President or the first Female ViceMichaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-86612707531113107512008-11-03T16:58:00.001-08:002008-11-04T07:56:12.176-08:00I was born to laughI learned to laugh through my tearsI was born to loveI'm gonna learn to love without fearPour me a glass of wineTalk deep into the nightWho knows what we'll findIntuition, deja vuThe Holy Ghost haunting youWhatever you gotI don't mindPut your elbows on the tableI'll listen long as I am ableThere's nowhere I'd rather beSecret fears, the supernaturalThank God for this new Michaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-36146201412647275422008-11-02T11:59:00.000-08:002008-11-02T12:19:17.394-08:00I heard someone qualify the other night at an A.A. meeting. It was his nineteenth sobriety birthday and he shared a little bit about his past. He said 20 years ago, he was a homeless drunk. He was sleeping in a shack in Woodlake behind the Nazarene Church. He said the pastor of the church allowed him to live in the shack and gave him money every morning for odd jobs around the church, which he Michaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-56804562369997367872008-10-25T22:01:00.001-07:002008-10-25T22:02:33.690-07:00I started an on-line radio station. If you are interest in checking out some of my music, check it out.Michaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-54144265650564193282008-10-21T08:55:00.000-07:002008-10-21T08:56:27.901-07:00A.A. quote of the week: "EGO, Edging God Out."Michaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-35018885282134759722008-10-20T13:46:00.001-07:002008-11-05T16:47:37.733-08:00This Monday sucks more than normal. I hate waking up tired and I hate waking up tired on a Monday mornings even more because it sets a bad precedence for the remainder of the week. Last night I had a hard time falling asleep. I tried reading in bed for a while; at about 11:30pm I thought I was good and ready to fall asleep. Though my eyes and body were tired, I couldn’t shut my mind off. I laid Michaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-11373513661734929772008-10-16T16:35:00.000-07:002008-10-16T16:38:27.125-07:00So, the Visalia Oaks changed their name to the Visalia Rawhide today. I have to say; initially I was extremely disappointed and upset over the change. I felt the name change was insulting; first to the history of the Visalia Oaks and second, to the residents of Visalia and the fans that faithfully supported Oaks. My wrath went as far as me writing a draft to submit to the Visalia Times Delta Michaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-60622962024226750712008-10-12T17:55:00.000-07:002008-10-12T18:06:52.893-07:00For those who are interested, my wife Audrey has started a blog. She is a lot better at sharing stories about the kids and our life then I am. Check it out.Michaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-2135530957663067632008-10-11T22:17:00.000-07:002008-10-11T22:31:15.754-07:00I have recently taken notice to this trend of mixing sport fighting with Jesus. I know two guys who are devote Christians and they participate in Mixed Martial Arts fighting. I found it kind of weird and odd, but hey, what ever. Recently I discovered that this trend is actually pretty big. I saw a T-shirt last week that said "Jesus Never Tapped Out" For those who dont already know, tapping out Michaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-79568123992616764392008-10-05T11:35:00.001-07:002008-10-05T11:37:06.241-07:00"It is impossible to meet God with sunglasses on. It is impossible to meet God without abandon, without exposing yourself, being raw."-BonoMichaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-42219156852077050362008-10-04T21:08:00.000-07:002008-10-04T21:17:22.185-07:00ChuckChuck is a guy who I see in my Saturday night A.A. meeting. I suspect that Chuck is homeless or lives in a shelter. Chuck may also be mentally delayed in some ways. If I remember right, I think he once shared that he had his skull fractured in the past. At times he has a hard time putting his thoughts together and other times can be a little annoying to others because of his need for Michaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-20749589114811861692008-09-30T08:01:00.000-07:002008-09-30T08:11:56.566-07:00I have an A.A. funny. Jerry, an 80-year-old ex-farmer, ex-cop and ex drunk was sharing about some of his old drinking days. He said he always hated the morning after a late night out with some co-workers because he would always get the same question, “ do you know how much you drank last night?” which he always responded with “no” because he was a blackout drinker. He said he hated that question Michaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-88839456787347824342008-09-29T11:34:00.000-07:002008-09-29T11:35:38.159-07:00A.A. Qoute of the week:"At first, I took a drink, then the drink took a drink, then the drink took me."Michaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-78771870502323546112008-09-23T22:35:00.001-07:002008-09-23T22:45:16.135-07:00Its just our first day back from vacation and already I feel overwhelmed and pressed! I was thinking in my math class tonight that I should maybe drop the class due to falling behind. Then I thought about cutting back some of my A.A. meetings. I don't really feel like I can afford to do either. Then add work hours and family time and commitment to my responsibilities, I almost feel like I am Michaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-84020074885516769112008-09-16T08:11:00.000-07:002008-09-16T08:29:16.208-07:00I am finding that living a life alcohol free in many ways for an alcoholic is like a tightrope walk. Its doesn’t take much to knock one of us down. If we do not focus intently on our balance, i.e. sobriety, we inevitability fall. Some fall and get right back up, others fall right to their deaths and some fall and stay down waiting until death comes and gets them.Michaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-49136809994174848572008-09-15T11:51:00.000-07:002008-09-15T11:53:12.035-07:00This photo of Jacob won an honorable mention at the County Fair this weekend.Michaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-32285939960678462692008-09-12T13:08:00.001-07:002008-09-13T05:23:34.785-07:00All day I think about it, then at night I say it.Where did I come from, and what am I supposed to be doing?I have no idea.My soul is from elsewhere, I’m sure of that,and I intend to end up there.This drunkenness began in some other tavern.When I get back around to that place,I’ll be completely sober. Meanwhile,I’m like a bird from another continent, sitting in this aviary.The day is coming when IMichaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-89316538728099764222008-09-12T09:36:00.001-07:002008-09-12T09:50:53.385-07:00I did a little Bible reading this morning and while looking up some references in the Bible with the word “sober”, I came across these. Become sober-minded as you ought, and stop sinning; for some have no knowledge of God. I speak this to your shame.-1 Corinthians 15:34This verse is so true with whom I have become over the last few years. Of course, I haven’t had much of a sober mind over the Michaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-22759576010450464862008-09-10T13:04:00.000-07:002008-09-10T13:07:45.206-07:00A.A. Quote of the week:"Judge if you wish, but remember you have lost your right to condemn."Michaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-85033571384343368142008-09-10T09:14:00.000-07:002008-09-10T16:03:08.669-07:00This morning on my way to work I saw a car I haven’t seen in a long time. It was a AMC Eagle Wagon. I have to say, by far this is my favorite car of the 1980s. Its so beastly looking and tough, but yet, elegant in a family-car kind of way, if that makes sense. I think the reason why I like my Chrysler Pacifica so much is because in many ways it resembles the Eagle Wagon. We never owned one, but Michaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-21695217835629976312008-09-02T09:00:00.000-07:002008-09-02T09:03:14.289-07:00A.A. Quote of the week:"Grateful people are happy people, those who aint, aint!"Michaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-82727554169309127882008-08-30T23:09:00.000-07:002008-08-30T23:10:28.166-07:00Some thoughts I had throughout the day:Show me someone who is a drinking alcoholic, with their life together and who can say honestly that they are happy on the inside, and I will pick that person to be my drinking sponsor and begin hitting the bottle immediately. Alcoholics are passionate people. Some remain passionate about their drinks while others become passionate about sobriety. If an Michaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-142758884866566822008-08-27T22:07:00.000-07:002008-08-27T22:08:58.651-07:00AA quote of the week: " Justice is getting what you deserve; Mercy is not getting what you deserve and Grace is getting what you don’t deserve."Michaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-36436527356194933952008-08-26T14:04:00.000-07:002008-08-26T21:33:45.901-07:00I know for the few of you guys who still read this blog, you were quite surprised to find out that I had a drinking problem. To tell you the truth, I was a surprised you guys didn’t know since I wrote about indirectly from time to time. Anyhow, I thought it would be a good time for me to qualify myself as an alcoholic and share a little bit of my story with you. It is really no surprise that I Michaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-58353803460917504432008-08-20T12:11:00.001-07:002008-08-20T12:21:47.733-07:00What the...What the hell is going on in San Francisco? Why is this not being covered by all of the national news agencies? The presence of military force by the Imperial Empire is direct threat to our national security and sovereignty. Michaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-41892705175299826172008-08-18T22:50:00.000-07:002008-08-18T23:22:45.131-07:00We just returned from a weekend camping trip at Big Meadows with some friends. It was a great weekend that ended all to quick. We hiked, swam, lounged and got dirty, especially the kids. Big Meadows has become my favorite place to camp. Audrey grew up camping there and over the last five years or so, I have grown to love it as much as she does. I have made many wonderful memories there. This is Michaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-89496659127705168042008-08-18T22:47:00.000-07:002008-08-18T22:50:20.504-07:00All of the kids in our group minus JacobThe GangGracie!Michaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-44688262749978147802008-08-18T22:35:00.000-07:002008-08-18T22:56:31.008-07:00Gracie and the GirlsJacob getting dirtyJacob and AudreyDon and Beck, our camping buddiesMichaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-73915041049265180192008-08-18T22:34:00.000-07:002008-08-18T22:35:33.517-07:00A.A. Quote of the week:"Resentment is like pissing on your leg, you are the only one who feels it."Michaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-82941730383313390592008-08-14T07:38:00.000-07:002008-08-14T08:00:34.512-07:00“Please could you stop the noise, I'm trying to get some restFrom all the unborn chicken voices in my head”- RadioheadThere is nothing worse than to go to bed physically and emotionally exhausted only to lay there for hours unable to sleep because your mind wont turn off. That’s what happen to me last night. Now I have to navigate through a workday half awake in a zombie mode until tonight and Michaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-87513986067142348042008-08-13T23:07:00.000-07:002008-08-14T10:41:53.657-07:00A.A. quote of the week:"Alcoholism is a disease that wants me dead, but will settle for drunk."Michaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-61605730530973958262008-08-09T09:26:00.000-07:002008-08-09T09:44:26.134-07:00Just about at every A.A. meeting I go to, someone says something I found profound. Last night someone said something I think is worth quoting. This rough looking biker guy with a long goat-tee beard, tattoo covered arms, ripped jeans and ragged shirt said, " There will come a time in your life that remaining sober will come down to just you and God". He went on to share that after a few years of Michaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-9265647514760231672008-08-09T09:03:00.000-07:002008-08-09T09:25:07.361-07:00Thursday was Jacob's one week post operation check-up with the doctor. Gracie went along with Audrey and Jacob into the examining room where the nurse carefully inspected Jacob's stitches for infections and to ensure he is healing correctly. Gracie listen intently as the nurse told Audrey that the tissue was healing fine and to continue placing neosorin directly on the stitches so that the tissueMichaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-85207083210807925602008-08-08T07:59:00.000-07:002008-08-08T08:23:22.151-07:00As I was driving to work this morning I found myself dwelling on a list of things that were literally sucking the joy out of me. This is a pretty regular thing with me. My wife is irritated at me this morning, I don’t have enough money to do some of the things I would like to do this weekend, I have a list of chores I need to get done at home and work and I am feeling pretty tired; poor, poor me.Michaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-60131853577497846402008-08-05T15:36:00.000-07:002008-08-06T16:52:22.763-07:00I heard a great story last night at my AA meeting. This guy, who I will call Sober Joe, was sharing about a detox hospital he was in 15 years ago. His sponsor and counselor was a Priest. After about 60 days of sobriety, Sober Joe asked the Priest a question. He asked, “when will things begin to change in life for the better?” The priest asked, “what do you mean?” “I don’t know, I just want to Michaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-75996301587269073932008-07-31T17:49:00.000-07:002008-07-31T17:56:50.184-07:00If you are a baseball fan like me, today was an exciting day as many teams made trades just prior to the MLB trade deadline. And if you are a Dodger fan like me, today was an awesome day, as the Dodgers acquired Manny “Man-Ram” Ramirez from the Boston Red Sox. This trade gives the Dodgers the desperately needed "big" bat. The Dodgers now have the advantage in the National League West. It's been aMichaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-52240216256674116072008-07-29T08:16:00.000-07:002008-07-29T11:53:25.712-07:00I feel as if things are getting better for me. I am beginning to feel better and stronger. Last week was a though week, but I got through it and things seem easier. I am beginning to see myself with a whole new set of eyes. Its as if I have awaken from some foggy spell that had kept me in a haze between being half asleep and half awake. Over the last 6 six years I have been just barley enough Michaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-53725548243279586702008-07-25T10:43:00.000-07:002008-07-25T10:45:52.793-07:00It’s been a year today since my one of best friends passed away. It still doesn’t seem right or real. I think of Jason all of the time. Little things trigger my memory of him, whether it be a song, a place, a Dodger game, the weather, a book or just a feeling or mood. I still wear the yellow “Live Strong” bracelet for him and his battle with cancer. Even at this moment as I type this, the Postal Michaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-29317878829691862762008-07-22T15:17:00.001-07:002008-07-22T15:17:47.405-07:00Getting honest with myself has not been an easy thing. I am having to swallow a lot of pride and admit things I have become accustom to ignore. I have realized that I am not a well person. I have flawed thinking, I am emotionally weaker than I portray, I want to control things I have no business or ability to control and I have this desire deep inside me to engage in self-destructive behaviors. Michaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931549.post-33805495519728670882008-07-08T16:42:00.000-07:002008-07-09T06:05:00.077-07:00“Getting honest with ourselves does not make us unacceptable to God. It does not distance us from God, but draws us to Him- as nothing else can- and opens us anew to the flow of grace. While Jesus calls us to a more perfect life, we cannot achieve it on our own. To be alive is to be broken; to be broken is to stand in the need of grace. It is only through grace that any of us could dare to hope Michaelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10040392761825276544noreply@blogger.com