Monday, July 31, 2006
I can’t really pin point when the turn actually happen to me, but this morning I realized that I am fully exhausted by people. I have been holed up in a cave for the last four or five months. Actually, it’s probably been longer than that. I usually consider myself an out-going person, who is always open to people. For all of my life, up to the last recent months, I have needed to be around people. I have lived and thrived in community. Now, I would rather stay home, play X-box, work in my yard, and go camping on weekends than spend time with people or friends.
Despite my exhaustion and lack of desire to spend time with people, I know I need it. And if I am going to be honest with myself I miss living in community. I horribly miss the Sunday nights at the VP with the guys, the Wednesday nights at our house with five other dysfunctional couples, weekend dinner parties and couples nights out. A strange conundrum I find myself in.
Walt Whitman wrote a great deal in regards to the space of community and self and Jesus’ documented life shows how he balanced the two. For me the scale seems to have tipped to one side.
Despite my exhaustion and lack of desire to spend time with people, I know I need it. And if I am going to be honest with myself I miss living in community. I horribly miss the Sunday nights at the VP with the guys, the Wednesday nights at our house with five other dysfunctional couples, weekend dinner parties and couples nights out. A strange conundrum I find myself in.
Walt Whitman wrote a great deal in regards to the space of community and self and Jesus’ documented life shows how he balanced the two. For me the scale seems to have tipped to one side.
